Leaving with a guilty conscious

There is n nothing like telling someone (a complete stranger) that you are about to be done with breastfeeding (I am telling them because I needed to know if I could be on this diet while breastfeeding) and them saying “Why stop, why not go for at least 6 months?” Well because just maybe there is more to the story than me just saying, “Hey, I’m no longer going to breastfeed!” Yes, there is defiantly more to the story and anyone who has read my blog knows the story!

Latching problems, breast shields, weight loss, taking over an hour to eat and then still hungry, low milk supply and mastitis twice! I will admit that even through all those challenges I still very much enjoyed the bonding experience and knowing that I was giving Wyatt the absolute best. Wyatt has been sleeping through the night for some time, and since then I have been getting up every four hours to pump to try to keep up my milk supply. It has recently come to my attention that even that is not working. Now when I nurse him, he latches on and is content for about 6 minutes, then he begins to pull away and cry, hit me and kick his little legs in frustration! In the end he gets nursed for about 12 minutes and then giving a bottle. Three hours later… I don’t even think about trying to nurse because I know there is not enough for him. It is no longer a nice bonding experience but a thirty-minute fight to get him to eat and be satisfied.

I feel very guilty that breastfeeding is about to come to an end but I have given Wyatt three months of my nutrient rich milk and I think that’s pretty darn good!